Charity fads seem to be all the rage these days. We had the Ice Bucket challenge, which presumably was to raise awareness of pneumonia or those who couldn’t afford heated showers? We had the no makeup selfie, which I guess was to raise money for Wayne Rooney to get a face transplant.
Now we have just come out of “Dry January,” the latest one of these in which people decide not to drink for the entire of January, and ask people to donate to charity on behalf of them not drinking. As with all of these charity dos it is no surprise to see Celebrities joining in on the craze. But sometimes they can take it too far, become too dedicated, or just simply misunderstand the whole concept.
In walks Urban Hipster Geography teacher Jurgen Klopp. He’s a huge advocate for charitable work, which explains why he is still giving Sturridge a wage. Although it would seem somebody forgot to mention to him that the drought in question should be alcohol, and not Premier League wins.
Liverpool have managed the entire month of January without a Premier League win. It took them two attempts to defeat minnows Plymouth, a team who would attract fewer fans watching in the FA Cup Final than Liverpool can attract by simply displaying Jurgen Klopp tying up his shoelaces.
But has his alarm not gone off? Has nobody told him we are now in February? As two previous cities of culture (how?) battled it out, Hull came away with a 2-0 victory over Liverpool. Loud whistles, hisses and possibly even boos could be heard from the Liverpool fans. But to be fair that is the closest they can get to fully comprehensible speech.
Meanwhile, at Selhurst Park, Damien Delaney got involved in an altercation with a fan who stormed the pitch. Apparently, Allardyce had promised the fan he could become a third party owner of Delaney and he just wanted a chance to see his new man in action.
Although Big Sam has been proven time and time again to be as squeaky clean as a three-legged dog running through muddy puddles, one thing that is squeaky clean is his record of never being relegated. However, unless he is to have an even shorter tenure at Crystal Palace than he did at England, that record may be under threat.
Jack Rodwell managed to break his curse of not winning a match he starts, as Crystal Palace were demolished by Sunderland. It’s been 3 years, 8 months and 29 days since he started a match that his team won, not that he’s counting. The relief and excitement were clearly too much for him however as he was carted off injured. But it’s okay, I’m sure he’ll have an easier time of it in the Championship.
The bookmakers would have been licking their lips whilst watching Everton vs Bournemouth, as I don’t think anyone would have been predicting that score line. Lukaku almost looked like a striker again as he netted four goals, showing glimpses of why he was in my fantasy league team last year, as opposed to being promptly removed this year. I’m not bitter though. It’s fine. Honestly.
Chelsea have kept themselves on track to be winning the league this year, as they brushed off an Arsenal who were about as competent as Stevie Wonder would be as a driving instructor. Arsenal seem to be content with sitting around in the top four but not challenging for the title. Arsenal fans however are becoming a special breed, and are almost overtaking Liverpool fans in the league for most time spent singing about past glories. Ian Wright, rightly (love it), said that Wenger has some serious thinking to do. Such as should I take the Ryanair flight back to France, or should I go with Easyjet?
My favourite story of the entire weekend doesn’t come from the Premier League, but in fact comes from the Championship. Gary Monk took exception to David Wagner joining in a group cuddle with the Brighton players after they scored the winner. The two squared up after Monk got in a paddy that none of his players ever gave him a cuddle. And quite frankly it’s the funniest clip I’ve seen in a long time.
The moral of the story kids is keep hugging your boss.