Fellas, it’s back! There’s no need to pretend you like cricket anymore. You don’t have to waste your weekends by playing make believe that you love spending time in the shops with your bird. You no longer have to feel guilty for wishing there was footy to watch when you’ve taken your kids out for the day – because now there is footy to watch. This is your excuse to get out of all the menial jobs the missus has you doing, like washing the car, cutting the grass or, god forbid, visiting her ma. Instead you can now throw away 6 hours on a Saturday afternoon by fiddling with your Kodi box, trying to find your teams game and only being able to watch a black screen or a picture of a football match. Yes, the best possible Saturday we can desire involves us watching our teams play on a fuzzy screen with the soundtrack of an Arabic commentator. This is what modern football is all about lads. What a time to be alive.
Imagine, IMAGINE, walking into your boss’ office on a Monday morning and demand that he lets you go as soon as possible. Imagine telling your boss that you can’t work today because you have been looking at other jobs and your “mindset” isn’t right. In any other occupation this would be unthinkable. Apparently, for a footballer, it’s sound. What’s that Diego, was your boss not nice to you? You want to stay at home in Brazil until you can leave the club? You poor thing, it must be so bad. Good of you to accept that you won’t be paid if you sit on your arse on Copacabana Beach though. How will you survive? Hope you have been shrewd enough to save 10% of the £150,000 a week for this rainy day. Sorry Philippe, a better job has come along and your employer won’t let you go? You mean the same employer that have made you into the player you are when the only other option at the time was Southampton? You mean the same employer that would only have 3 weeks to replace you? That employer? Riiiiiiiiight. What did you say Virgil, You’re feeling victimised because your club disciplined you for acting inappropriately because you couldn’t move away? You feel your club has acted wrongly by segregating you when you threatened to down tools? I see your point. The fact of the matter lads is that, if you were in any other profession in any other walk of life, you’d have been sacked by now. The only reason you haven’t and you feel comfortable acting this way, is because you know your worth and you know what your employers would lose if they sacked you. Bit of a slimy move by people who have some much to be thankful for if you ask me.
Transfer Story of the Week
Yesterday a Charlton Athletic player left the club and moved to second division Belgian side, Oud-Heverlee Leuven. If it was any other player then it would be an unremarkable transfer. But the player in question wasn’t any other player. The departing Charlton striker was Tony Watt. Tony Watt might be a name that makes you say to yourself, “Where have I heard that name before?” I can tell you that he has never been on Celebrity Big Brother or Love Island. Let me take you back to 7th November 2012. Celtic Park is hosting another famous European night with Barcelona as Celtic’s visitors in the group stages of the Champions League. After Victor Wanyama’s header put the home side ahead, it was clear that Celtic needed another goal to seal a historic victory. A young substitute entered the fray and wrote his name in green and white folklore. With 7 minutes of the game left, the ball bounced through to Tony Watt and he fired past Victor Valdes to secure the win for Celtic. Leo Messi would score an injury time consolation but it wasn’t enough. Alexis Sanchez, Andres Iniesta, Xavi and Pedro Rodriguez couldn’t break down the likes of Mikael Lustig, Charlie Mulgrew, Kelvin Wilson and Joe Ledley. Tony Watt instantly became a Celtic hero, but since then he has become the answer to a quiz question. No matter what depths of European football Watt finds himself in during the remainder of his career, he’ll always have that night in Glasgow against Barcelona.