The Magnificent 7: Blonde bombshells, a match made in heaven a decade too late and the internal monologue of Tony Pulis

The Magnificent 7

#1 David Moyes

Look, I don’t for one minute think that Moyseh is on the way to total and utter redemption. Two clean sheets in a row may not signal an entirely new dawn, but those two clean sheets have come from dropping Joe Hart and getting four points off Chelsea and Arsenal. Enjoy it whilst it lasts Dave.

#2 Riyad Mahrez

All it needed was a Frenchman in charge and a new bleached blonde crop of hair for Mahrez to return to the kind of form that had Real Madrid, Barcelona and, er, Arsenal sniffing around a couple of years ago. Maybe the players can pick him out better now and get the ball to him faster?

#3 Wayne Rooney & Sam Allardyce

As both (hopefully) reach the twilight years of their respective careers, you can’t help but wonder what could have happened to English football if these two had got together earlier in life. Rooney has been in terminal decline since he has 28, but with Allardyce telling him where to jog slowly to he is suddenly looking pretty dangerous again. Don’t forget, Allardyce has form of getting every last drop out of formerly brilliant top-level players.

#4 Claude Puel

There’s a German word that sums this up beautifully, schadenfreude. There’s probably an equivalent in French. Bombed out of Southampton for refusing to change his style of football because, frankly, he knows it works he ended up at Leicester City. Leicester have been transformed under the Frenchman and he took his team down to his former employers and showed them exactly how boring his football is.

#5 Crystal Palace

There isn’t a lot of good value for money in London life nowadays, but watching Palace at Selhurst Park is starting to fly up the list. If they (Benteke) are not missing injury-time penalties then Wilfried Zaha is suddenly realising they have a match to win with two minutes left on the clock. It was another fine performance for Palace under Uncle Roy and they will not get relegated.

#6 The Marco Silva haters

Ever since Watford refused to let Marco Silva talk to Everton, Watford have won once in five. Sam Allardyce has had a pop, players have stopped closing out games and suddenly Watford are on the slide. Could the hottest property in the Premier League be sacked by the end of the season?

#7 Tony Pulis

Tony must be watching Alan Pardew let his former side “off the leash” and pissing himself seeing they are yet to score for their new gaffer yet. He must be watching Paul Clement flounder at Swansea City thinking “don’t leave it too late boyos” and keeping an eye on Stoke City pondering how long it would take him to sort out the mess Mark Hughes has created.