Would you believe it? I did better this week. OK, it was hard to worse. I know that. But hey, spoiler alert, green arrows this time round!
Let’s find out how.
Jordan Pickford, 3 points
Can I trust Sham Allarfarce to keep Everton tight enough that Jordan starts to pick up proper points again? I don’t know, but the stopper got an extra point for being forced into three saves against Palace.
Jamaal Lascelles, 6 points
Incredibly, Newcastle’s captain was not in the bonus points following their 1-0 win over Manchester United. Still, he was a big reason as to why they kept a clean sheet and that clean sheet gave me another four points.
Phil Jones, 2 points
One half of the United Laurel and Hardy tribute act at St James’ Park.
Ben Davies, 12 points
That’s what I am talking about Benno! A fine cross to the right man, or Harry Kane as he is better known meant Benno gets a clean sheet and an assist. Three bonus points too!
Cesar Azpilicueta, 8 points
Cesar was back with a modicum of form last night. A clean sheet, albeit against West Bromwich Albion and two bonus points is a decent shift.
Ben Mee, 2 points
My other Ben sneaked into the lineup as David Silva was absent once more. So his two points are better than none.
Luca Milivojevic, 8 points
Another goal for Luka, though his ability to take penalties is going to be severely hampered by the fact that Wilf Zaha is out for a month.
Richarlison, 2 points
And that folks, that is Richarlison’s last performance for me. Thanks for your early season efforts, lad.
Dele Alli, 3 points
A quiet one for Dele, but hey ho.
Harry Kane, 12 points
Another winning NLD goal, all trebled as he was skipper. Do I regret not giving the armband to Sergio? Of course I do!
Sergio Aguero, 21 points
That could have been 63 as I deliberated, again, over making him skipper. But Kane always scored against Arsenal, you see? Four goals for Sergio, killer.
So much better than it could have been. We move up a league place, I am just outside the top 3,000 in Spain and now I have some transfer activity to get on with.
You don’t get much for £6.3m in midfield anymore, that’s for sure. After at least two minutes of pondering I settled on;
Well, Stoke probably won’t go down and anything good that happens, happens through him. Will it work? We shall see.