Think of all the seasons in years gone by. Think of all the Augusts spent guessing the league table from 1-20. All the years ‘yer da’ said that the three teams who had just come up would go straight back down, that Spurs would win the league, and it would finally be “Everton’s year”

It’s hard to recall the last time Everton have gone into a season without justified optimism. Whether it was the countless years of being “on the cusp of Europe” under David Moyes, the false dawns of Roberto Martinez or the Ronald Koeman season before the fans were baying for blood because his wife hung a few red baubles on an artificial tree.

In fairness, if my team’s manager tweeted “#busyfootball#period”, I wouldn’t be renewing my Season Ticket either.

I’ll be honest, I believed the hype coming out of Goodison last summer. The likes of Klaasen, Rooney, Sigurdsson and Keane seemed very un-Everton-like transfers. By that I mean, that they had signed players I had actually heard of before. Even this Sandro lad sounded intriguing. Spanish, 22 years old, former Barcelona striker. His hairline was his downfall in the end. You can’t blame the club for sending him back out on loan in January, not good for the public image when Rooney’s at the club as well.

Yes, that hype dropped off a cliff sometime around mid to late August. The season was summed up in no better fashion than by this legend, have a read through the thread.

Allardyce has been a laugh though, hasn’t he? As a Liverpool fan, there’s a few of us who are genuinely starting to think that he’s on the wind-up, completely taking the piss and abusing the minimal amount of power that comes with managing the Blues.

From the dire football, Marco Silva getting sacked two months after the vacancy at Goodison closed, the Van Dijk header, the Ross Barkley move, the Lukaku voodoo story, Gueye’s contract all the way up to some shocking results and so much more in between. It’s as Everton as Everton can get. Another season that promised hopes of a run in Europe, a new dawn with a young and exciting squad, cup glory perhaps, and maybe even changing the top six into a top seven. It all ends with a 23rd consecutive year without silverware, one of the worst European campaigns ever by an English team in Europe and nothing to play for in the league post-January, as well as a comical season off-the-pitch.

Even when Allardyce came in, you thought things could look up for the Toffees. An old-school English coach that would embody the north-west footballing ethos of “Everyone hates us, and we don’t care”.  Surely he could galvanise the dressing room and put a rocket up some of the players’ backsides, coupled with the introduction of Sammy Lee as assistant. Yer Da told you that Sammy played in real derbies, when football was played by men, not haircuts. “He’ll sort them out,” he said. His legacy will be his sound bites though, heralding his own shortcomings as glorious progress.


Yeah, you’re not wrong Sam. If all League ties were over two legs this season:

Everton 1-1 Liverpool (Everton advance on away goals)

Everton 0-6 Manchester United

Everton 3-10 Arsenal

Everton 0-2 Chelsea

Everton 0-7 Tottenham

Everton 2-4 Manchester City.

They never had to appoint him in the first place y’know. In no serious danger of going down considering their squad and the dross around them in the league (The fact that Everton sit in ninth at time of writing goes to show how poor the league really is), they could’ve gone for a long-term option. But they gave Allardyce an inch, and he took a mile.

The maddest thing about it all? They’re only a few points off 7th.


All the best.