Todays Tales

The supporters of Leeds United have always been passionate. They travel in huge numbers to cheer on their heroes and replicate the same level of devoted support when their idols take to the Elland Road pitch for home games, too.

Alas, for the hordes who backed Marcelo Bielsa’s side it was a case of huge disappointment as they fell at the penultimate hurdle in their quest to reach the Premier League; the big time that is housed in the Promised Land – a pinnacle that, their army of followers would have you believe, is their divine right. Fans of every other club in the world would disagree, however.

Despite playing a thrilling, jaw-dropping and often mesmerising brand of football under Bielsa, the Whites missed out when they failed to beat Frank Lampard’s Derby County over two legs in the play-off semi-final. The Rams now go on to face Aston Villa in the one-off showpiece game at Wembley Stadium this Bank Holiday Monday for the last remaining place available in the top-flight.

But, it seems, Leeds fans the world over — and out of this world, too — are refusing to quell their fervour when it comes to getting behind their all-white boys. And this can certainly be backed up with the revelatory announcement that the Elland Road outfit have set up two new supporters clubs – one for aliens and one for ghosts!

Speaking from notes in the shadow of the Billy Bremner statue, club spokeswoman Jenny Washofhog said that after careful consideration, it was felt that the demand was such that there was reason to set up the groups. She added:

“Leeds have the very best support in the land, of that there is no doubt. Subsequent to the amazing number of fans we have in the real world, we also have a good number of apparitions and extra-terrestrials who follow the club’s fortunes.

“Obviously, we are open to derisory comment from our detractors given that we have taken this step. But believe me the interest is there. We have named Ed Izmizzen, a 14th Century villain who was beheaded at York Assizes for pinching a loaf of bread, as the chairman of the Leeds United Fan-toms. Ed is in touch through our weekly seances and he assures us he knows plenty of other spooks and spectres who are keen to join.

“And heading up the Elland Extra-terrestrials is Derek Bigolbollochs, who says he is from Donrevie, a planet in the depths of the Milky Way. He communicates via email and seems a very nice guy and is very knowledgeable about the team, too. Once the groups are better established we hope to be able to provide tickets for them to attend games and this will increase even further the record-breaking number of supporters have at games.”