It must be difficult to be Phil Neville, mustn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n
Imagine being inside his head or, even harder perhaps, finding something interesting there.<\/p>\n
This may be the stuff of fantasy, which is probably why I started thinking about it on Sunday when watching the BAFTA awards ceremony in London. Never mind the usual accolades and gongs, this year seemed to be more about who could be the loudest prophet of hope, while wearing black on the red carpet; how all women were created equal (with men) but some women were clearly more equal than others, and how Emma Watson donated \u00a31 million to the new \u2018UK Justice and Equality Fund\u2019 just to show that not all child actors disappear without trace when they grow up.<\/p>\n
Pretending to be a successful female scriptwriter \u2013 as so many at the Royal Albert Hall on Sunday would fantasise about \u2013 I thought that Phil trying to follow a script might be illuminating.<\/p>\n
Me: So, Phil. You\u2019ve selected Anita Asante for your first England women squad. What was your thinking behind this?<\/p>\n
Phil: Ha ha. You\u2019re teasing me (but I quite like that in a woman). I asked you to ask me an easy one for starters \u2013 just until I got warmed up.<\/p>\n
Me: OK. Chelsea? Discuss.<\/p>\n
Phil: Over-rated and poxy little ground. We should never have lost to them in the Cup. I would never, ever knowingly give anyone from there the time of day. It\u2019s just the way I am, right.<\/p>\n
Me: But Anita plays for them, as does Hannah Blundell?<\/p>\n
Phil: Not a great name is it? Let\u2019s be honest. Hope she\u2019s not a defender \u2013 can\u2019t afford to give penalties away with mistimed tackles, just when the game is won.<\/p>\n
Me: But you said that \u2018the door is not closed to anyone\u2019.<\/p>\n
Phil: You\u2019re putting words in my mouth, love. I think you\u2019d find \u2013 if you\u2019d done your research properly instead of getting the kids off to school or making the beds \u2013 that they come from either Greg or Martin.<\/p>\n
Me: Your bosses at the FA?<\/p>\n
Phil: That got me the job with absolutely no experience of women\u2019s football, yeah. They\u2019re trying to educate me you see.<\/p>\n
Me: And is it working \u2013 this education?<\/p>\n
Phil: Wait until we go off camera and I\u2019ll show you a few moves!<\/p>\n
Me: Anita claimed she was poorly treated on race grounds by your predecessor.<\/p>\n
Phil: I have always maintained that it\u2019s a marathon, not a sprint.<\/p>\n
Me: So, Anita being black and your paying some kind of allegiance to the Time\u2019s Up movement was not part of your consideration when selecting her?<\/p>\n
Phil: You do use some long words, don\u2019t you? Not just a pretty face eh! Ooh, the silent treatment \u2026 OK, no, I never gave it a thought. Besides, Alex Ferguson\u2019s given up now and it\u2019s up to us \u2013 the crass of 92 \u2013 to carry on in his footsteps. I don\u2019t need a watch because I never go anywhere without my mobile phone, so that\u2019s a start isn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n
Me: And you are confident that England have a good chance in the SheBelieves Cup?<\/p>\n
Phil: Sounds like the morning after the night before with Julio Iglesias doesn\u2019t it? No, only joking. I\u2019m really looking to our trip to the States; I just love those huge pancakes for breakfast.<\/p>\n
Me: Did you watch the BAFTA awards ceremony on Sunday, Phil?<\/p>\n
Phil: With Joanna Lumley presenting the awards instead of that, you know \u2026<\/p>\n
Me: Do you like Joanna, Phil?<\/p>\n
Phil: What man wouldn\u2019t! Wasn\u2019t she in the New Avengers?<\/p>\n
Me: You\u2019d better believe it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It must be difficult to be Phil Neville, mustn\u2019t it? Imagine being inside his head or, even harder perhaps, finding something interesting there. This may be the stuff of fantasy, which is probably why I started thinking about it on Sunday when watching the BAFTA awards ceremony in London. Never mind the usual accolades and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":29,"featured_media":7389,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[648],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n