Todays Tales

Sorry I didn’t talk to you all yesterday. I was a man in shock. Still in shock from Monday night. You see, I was very much part of the “Wenger will never change” brigade, and boy do I feel like a fool now. Arsene had me fooled, and I am happy to admit it. He is still a tactical genius. I mean, a man of his age hiding in his office and devising a tactical revolution? Arsene, I apologise. Credit to you for coming up with the novel approach of three at the back. And launching it away to a team nearly relegated? That takes a real man. I had you wrong. Now, go and bang on the boardroom door and demand they turn that two-year deal into a five-year one. You are on to something sir!

Everton are rumoured to have literally slapped a £100m price tag to the forehead of Romelu Lukaku. That’s an interesting image. Either way, imagine how much he would cost once he developed a first touch? Mind you, that is what players are going for nowadays and he does score a few goals I suppose. Who would be foolish enough to spend that though? Anyone got Ed Woodward’s number?

Carlos Tevez isn’t exactly an instantly likeable fellow, I am sure most of us would agree. It probably wasn’t his fault Sheffield United got relegated, but he was the player involved. He probably had good reason to tell Mancini he didn’t fancy coming on as substitute. He must have given his move from Boca to China a lot of thought, I mean he is far from a mercenary I am sure. Therefore, I am convinced that Carlos had a very good reason to be at Disneyland when his team who, out of the goodness of their heart, are paying him around £600k a week were in action in the Chinese Super League. The fans who are far from impressed probably don’t realise what a good soul Carlos actually is.

John Terry has announced he will be leaving Chelsea at the end of the season. Hang on, didn’t we do this last year? Mind you, he has played so infrequently for Conte that you could have convinced me he had already left. However, this time JT is not ruling out staying in the Premier League. If only ‘Arry Redknapp was a manager somewhere, he’d definitely give Terry a stupidly well paid contract. Oh, wait. And Birmingham have some cash to foolishly throw around as well. Don’t go flying to China just yet JT!

Before the match on Tuesday, Vardy had been talking about getting one of those blue plaques in his kitchen, to forever mark the moment where Leicester learned they had won the Premier League. Admittedly, Lewis Carroll is turning in his grave, but it’s not the most stupid thing Vardy has ever said. Leicester ran Atletico close last night, and have, grudgingly, done themselves proud in Europe this season. It will be interesting to see what they do league wise now though, as I get the feeling they might decide that it’s time for an early holiday, mentally at the very least.

Finally today, Jack Wilshere has turned to religion over his frustrations over always being injured. He is hoping that being in with the big man might get him some injury free spells so he can play the game he was once quite good at. Jack, my son, God is rumoured to be pretty good, but even that one his beyond him,