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The Final Nail In The Koeman Coffin

It’s been coming, hasn’t it? To be honest I was amazed he was still in a job six hours after yesterday’s game had finished. Ronald Koeman has been hanging on by the skin of his teeth for a few weeks now and, on Monday, Everton owner Farhad Moshiri and overly emotional chairman Bill Kenwright finally put him out of his misery. There’s been many factors that contributed to the Dutchman’s sacking. First of all he bought a raft of players in the summer who followed absolutely no plan or foresight. Then he failed to get those players to knit together or find a tactical solution that would suit them best. The final nail in the coffin of Koeman though was the debacle that unfolded at Goodison Park against Arsenal. If Arsenal are your opposition at home, then it is usually a gimme. Not for Everton however. No, they found a way to let the most spineless side in Britain put five past them. They’re easy to beat Ronald, you just have to rough them up a bit, did you not watch Troy Deeney’s interview on BT last week? Ronald Koeman has proven one thing to me, if anything, which is that you should never trust a man with blonde hair over the age of 12 years old.

Leicester Logic

Craig Shakespeare got the Leicester job in quite a snide way, I think you will all agree. Practically undermining the manager that gave Leicester fans the greatest memories of the lives should be enough to get Shakespeare a place on the ‘Great British Snake Off’ (take notice ITV). In fairness though he wasn’t doing a terrible job. He steadied what looked like a sinking ship, bought some decent players in the summer and, OK they were towards the bottom of the table, but it certainly looked salvageable. So you can imagine my utter disbelief this week when Srivindinnerdprabababababa decided to do away with Shakesneer after a mediocre start to the season. Jesus lads, at least give the fella a chance to fail. You were hardly Everton standards of shit. Where do Leicester go from here though? Who replaces Shakesneer? ¬†Ryan Giggs has apparently thrown his hat in the ring. I don’t know about you lot but if he is going to commit career suicide, then I’d much rather see him do it at Everton.

Why Do I Do This To Myself?

Like the rest of the country I watched Liverpool get taken apart on Sunday by Spurs. Like all Liverpool fans I did so through the gaps between my fingers as my hands cradled my poor, poor eyes. After the game I was stood in my kitchen, folding my washing in probably the angriest possible manner, and asked myself a question on par with the meaning of life – why do I put myself through this? Year after year, I think, “this year it’s going to be different.” And it never is. Every year I’m let down and have to watch teams I hate make a show of the team I love. Then I stopped myself from descending into¬† pit of depression and pondered a few answers. Maybe it’s because I need a void filled in my life. Maybe it’s because football is a part of me. Maybe it’s because I really do believe that it will be different. I thought about all these philosophical answers and eventually settled on this one – I couldn’t live if every weekend was like an international weekend.

About the Author

Dean Mannion
Golden stars given to anyone who gets the wrestling references, medals given to anyone who doesn't get pissed off by what I write