I really do, I blame Easter and the whole Christian faith if I have to. I need to share responsibility for this week otherwise it might just start getting me down.
Good news – the players I signed last week still appear to be in my squad.
The bad news – when I checked straight after Mo Salah scoring at Palace, he WAS ON THE BENCH.
That’s right, I’d forgotten to check the team. And worse than that, Dominic Calvert-bloody-Lewin was still my captain.
I might as well give up.
But, having just logged on now to check my scores it appears Mo found his way into the side due to Aguero not playing so, bonus!
Let’s see how the shambles went this time round.
Jordan Pickford, 1 point
At home to Everton where Sham planned to have less than 20% of the ball? I’ll take only three conceded and Pickford getting a point thank you very much.
Ben Davies, 4 points
Hey, Ben. Rudiger is just going to keep pinging it over your shoulder to Victor, alright? Davies was caught narrow as Moses plonked it on to the head of Morata at Stamford Bridge but it didn’t really matter in the end.
Cesar Azpilicueta, 1 point
In the good old days, it would have been Cesar crossing for Alvaro to score.
Ben Mee, 2 points
Dammit, I would have picked Jamaal Lascelles I think. Well, I say that now I know Newcastle kept a clean sheet.
Luka Milivojevic, 9 points
I love Luka. Another penalty netted and a bonus two points for playing pretty well.
Heung-Min Son, 5 points
An assist and two points for playing 90 for Son. Hopefully, I haven’t signed him at the end of this sparkling run of form.
Dele Alli, 15 points
Out of form, is he? A brace from Dele got Spurs their first win at Chelsea in a very, very long time. He also got the three bonus points and finished off Chelsea’s Champions League hopes.
David Silva, 11 points
2 assists, man-of-the-match and set the tempo for City being just one win away from the title. What a man.
Mohamed Salah, 7 points
I know, it’s not the worst midfield in the world is it? Mo got the winner down at Selhurst Park.
Dominic Calvert-Lewin, 10 points
He actually got an assist, so wearing the armband wasn’t a complete waste of time.
Glenn Murray, 0 points
Oh, Glenn. What have you done?
Total: 65 points
Actually, it wasn’t that bad in the end – arrows are green and I am up to 13th in the league. Onwards to the weekend and I will remember to make the changes I need to make. Honest. Though you’d probably rather I forget.