That gives a whole new meaning to the Makelele role, doesn’t it? The Chelsea legend, the guy that was N’Golo Kante before N’Golo Kante, the player that made Frank look good and bought Terry time on the ball has a new role in the game. He has reappeared at Swansea as Paul Clement’s number two. Apparently Claude called Paul and asked if he could help. If Alan Curbishley had realised it was that easy to get back into the game, he wouldn’t just be getting linked with every job going he’d be getting them.
José Mourinho has reminded fans at Old Trafford that when they come to watch his team, they are not going to the theatre. Therefore, they are allowed to make some noise. Following some of the theatrics thrown around by José earlier in the season, you can forgive United fans for assuming that Old Trafford was the modern day Globe Theatre. Actually, it was more the Victoria Theatre in Woking right in the middle of pantomime season. Either way, Mourinho would like the fans to make Old Trafford somewhat daunting for Liverpool when they visit at the weekend. Considering the infamous photo tweeted by Gary Neville from Anfield in their last meeting, providing United fans keep their phones in their pockets and shout a bit they will already be more intimidating than their Scouse counterparts.
Morgan Schneiderlin to Everton is dragging a bit now. I mean, he’s not Pogba so can we get this wrapped up by Friday please? £22m is thought to be the price meaning that Gaya is going to have a new buddy in midfield to run around with chasing the ball just given away by Ross Barkley. Everton are also lining up the talented Algerian player who isn’t Riyad Mahrez or Islam Slimani. They are going to splash £10m on a striker called Ishak Belfodil. Nope, me neither but then I am not hipster enough to be au fait with the squad of Standard Liege.
By all account John Terry is not about to start being picked for the Cherries. So close to the perfect pun, but yet so far. How about this? JT now has the mobility of a glacier, so signing for the Cherries would be apt. Oh sod it, it’s not happening anyway.
Finally, Manchester City are being charged with doping offences. As ever, the headline is far grander than the actual story. Apparently some paperwork has been filled in incorrectly with regard to player whereabouts. Which opens the door beautifully to do all manner of “*insert your own player* goes missing for City” punchlines. I’ll leave that one with you. I’m done for today.
Southampton and City? Pah, someone else can fill you in on that.